Welcome To The Official Blog Of Porn Star Monica Mayhem

Another great weekend of dancing. Greenbay is a very small but nice town. The Oval Office (strip club) was very nice also. I started off thursday having to get a license to dance, then went to the club to do a radio interview, before heading back to my hotel to get ready for the night. 3 shows every night. On Thursday, the DJ got in trouble for saying the ‘C’ word. I guess Americans really dont like that word at all, the girls thought he was talking about them! haha, so they all threatened not to tip him. He was just playin around, pretending to be Australian, but when he said it on the mic, everyone’s heads just turned all at once. I was crackin’ up on stage. It was pretty funny. Some people need a bit more of a sense of humour I think!

Cooter ball was tough on the first night, took 3 songs before anyone got the dollar bill in the shotglass! But hey, its worth it to win a free dvd right? And of course I took my lotion show to the stage – plenty of pics of that on my website, and dancing. I love to do the lesbian shows, seems to go down really well! Who wouldn’t like to see 2 girls in 69? I also did rides for 5. That was alot of fun, but damn my knees were all bruised up from that, to the point where I had to stop doing that in the rest of my shows. Thank god the rails around the stage were padded, I think every club should do that, genius idea!

I did quite alot of lapdances too. One for a couple – that seems to be a trend with me, the couples thing. I know they went straight home after that dance! Most people were too shy to actually come up and say hi to me. They would just stare and wave. haha. I really dont bite you know! I’m always sitting there smiling saying hi, but people are just scared of me!

I was leaving the hotel on sunday, and there was about 500 12yr olds there. My driver asked the girls to let me through cause I had a plane to catch, and they were all yelling ‘bye Gwen Stefani’, it was so cute. I’m very flattered, but I know I dont look like Gwen.

Greenbay airport would have to be my favorite of all time! There was no-one in line, and the security guards were all smiling and very talkative. What a nice change to travel that way. As you can imagine, LAX is not the friendliest airport, with a ton of people in line.

Now I’m back home in LA for 2 weeks and have the longest list of things to do. Was so nice to go grocery shopping today and be able to make my own fresh and healthy food! Living off of hotel and stripclub food is not exactly always the healthiest or tastiest. Although I had a really great burger at the club! haha, so naughty. Not looking forward to doing taxes! ahhhhhhhhhh. Again, I’m late with that. Oh well, gotta do what you gotta do! Now back to work!

stay tuned…… xoxo mon

I had a great time dancing at TD’s Eubanks, and Fantasy World in Albuquerque, New Mexico. Since my favorite game, ‘Cooter Ball’, was not allowed to be played in the club, due to some law. I incorporated a couple of other acts into my show. Why didn’t I think of this before???? The lotion show – I pour lotion all over my body and rub it in, then let the customers slap their bills on me, to create an outfit of $$$.

The other thing, ‘Rides for 5′. Alot of clubs wont let you do most of these types of shows, due to state or county laws, but this one involves the customer giving me $5, and I drag them on stage and give a dirty little dance – up very close and personal. I had so many girls and guys wanting to do this. Of course you dont get a full song or anything – that you have to come and see me for after the show. But you get a very nice view!

I wish I could have got to do more in New Mexico, but I spent all the time sleeping due to major jet lag and insomnia. I really wanted to go on the skyrail up in the mountains! Maybe some other time. I did eat some giant Oysters while I was there, they were on steroids! Seriously, I’ve never seen them so big. A little too meaty for my liking though. Apparently they came from Louisiana. Yes, I am an oyster conneissuer. You either love em or hate em, I happen to LOVE them.

So Tomorrow I fly out to Greenbay, Wisconsin to dance at ‘Oval Office’. Which I hear is a great city and a great club. Home of the Greenbay Packers I hear – since I know nothing about football. Too bad I dont have a green and gold outfit – since that is also the colors of Australia! This gives me an idea for a new costume.

Anyway, got lots to take care of right now.

stay tuned…

mon xoxo

okay, so this really isn’t about me. Or perhaps its more about my perversions. You see, I’m in my hotel in Albuquerque, New Mexico. And right now, I would be sleeping after a long night of dancing and signing at 2 different clubs. However, the couple next door, can’t seem to get enough. SEX that is. I kid you not, they’ve been going at it for at least 2hrs now. I know this because their bed keeps banging up against my wall, and every now and then I hear moans from some girl.

As much as this turns me on. Since I’m a voyuer and love to hear people having sex. I cant help but feel sorry for this girl, because either, the guy cant come. Or he thinks marathon sex is a turn on. Well, I’m sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but most girls can’t handle hours of sex. Either physically, because you get sore down there, or you’ve cum so many times and enoughs enough, or your worn out and just want to go to sleep already. Unless of course, your 100% totally in love, thats different, and this has only happened to me once or twice. It’s like, I want him inside me for hours. Or I may just want to feel his arms around me, and his naked body right up close to mine.

But hey, I could be wrong here, some girls get off on hours of sex. Everyone is built differently. I for one, love sex, but not hours of it. I love foreplay, teasing, touching, kissing, I love the first time with a guy, the initial ‘are we gonna do it’ question in your head (providing the guy is not blatantly forceful and cocky about having sex). The, no talking, heavy breathing, grinding up against each other, until things naturally lead up to sex. Now that is a great way to describe it! Wow, is it just me or does that just sound so hot? And dont tell me you cant relate. Cause otherwise, I might be considered a nymphomaniac.

 And you know, sometimes, I love whispering dirty thoughts to the guy, not out loud like we do on camera, but just softly, is such a turn on to me. And as long as the guy is reciprocating, and not asking stupid questions like ‘r u okay’, then things should work out fine.

Hey, I’m giving you all free advice here! Dont turn off your partner by talking too much during sex, unless its to say how hot they are, or how much they turn you on, or what you would like them to do to you or vice versa. We dont want to hear about your problems, or what time you have to get up the next day. Just shut up, and do as your told! Trust me, you’ll make many women, very happy. You give and you get. What goes around, comes around – that’s my daily motto! And dont forget it!!!

xoxo Mon

I’ve been having a great time back home in OZ. Started off a week or so ago in Lorne VIC, at the AdultEx convention. It was all toy distributors and retailers, not a fan thing, but I signed alot of store posters for my Saucy Aussie Collection of toys. And hopefully will be back in around 6 months to do some store signings around the country!
Everyone was so cool and so much fun, Calvista really did a great job. Drank quite alot, while being jetlagged at the same time – not a good combo, but I got through it just fine.
Next stop Sydney, had a few days to catch up with a few people, before heading to melbourne to dance at the Spearmint Rhino. Which was alot of fun, had a great time and the staff were amazing. So many hot chicks! The patrons aren’t used to features, so I got on the mic on the last night and that created a big stir, did alot of lapdances that night.
Went out to a couple of clubs afterwards, but a little bit too heavy for my liking. Long gone are my days of hardcore trance and techno clubbing. It was really a bit seedy, so we left and continued the party in my hotel.
Had a couple of girlfriends come down to Melbourne, so we did a bit of shopping, and went to some nice restaurants.
Now i’m back in Sydney with my family, catching up on emails etc.. Got alot of friends to see this week. Not enough time here unfortunately, but I gotta fly to New Mexico to dance the day after I get back to LA.
Stayed tuned…